Uncategorized

I have a couple of questions

Last friday, I had a dr’s appt and she gave me a tetanus shot. This is so when my mom asks me, and she will ask me, “When was your last tetanus shot?” I can say “Friday Aug. 25, 2006.” Also, I guess they’ve seen an increase in tetanus in adults lately. So, it left me with a very sore lump in my left arm, that I still have. I still have a lump. Should I still have a lump? After five days? Seems excessive. It’s probably an arm tumor. A bicep tumor.

Random observation: what a brilliant idea it was to give me the tetanus shot before I planned to clean my home office. I think my dr. understands me more than I thought.

There was another question… I had another question… before lunch. I was going to blog about it. But then I went to Johnny Rockets with KK and stuffed myself with freshly fried french fries and now I can’t remember anything but how awesome I am at napping.

Standard
Uncategorized

The kids are on my side.

I feel bad. I can tell from my stats that people check the jodicam, only to be disappointed (I assume) by the lack of onlineness. The thing is, I have not been computing in the office lately, where the jodicam is set up. I’ve been laptop mobile. Additionally, Wil and I have recently discovered the genius that is Skype. I knew about it before, but lately we have been voice chatting over the internet instead of using the phone. And if you’ve ever made long distance calls to Canada from the states, you know that FREE is good. I’ve been using the iSight as a microphone, which keeps it from acting as the jodicam. But, Thursday afternoon I am working from home, so I might have it up and running then. And tomorrow evening I will probably be cleaning the office to make room for working from home, so maybe I’ll have it online while I clean. Won’t that be exciting for everyone involved.

Have ya’ll heard of Vox? It’s Six Apart’s new blog community. Six Apart being the makers of MovableType, which I use to write this blog. I believe it’s in some sort of beta right now. You can only sign up by receiving an invitation. Of course, all you have to do is ask for one, I believe. However, you can also get one from other vox members. I have some if any of you are interested. Check it out. It’s quite nice. Especially if you don’t want to mess with the design and layout aspects very much. They make it very easy to add books, music, videos, pictures, etc. Nicer, and prettier, than myspace, by a way lot.



Anyway, Wil’s latest blog is on Vox. And he is enjoying it quite a bit. He’s on a mission to collect more “neighbors.” Sort of the classier equivalent to myspace friends. I only have two neighbors. Him, and the Vox team. I don’t really know what to do with my vox page right now. I thought about making it some kind of theme blog. For example, if i were pregnant, it could be a pregnancy blog, Separate from my “regular” blog. But I don’t have any real themes to write about. I thought about making it a book blog, but I should be using Satan’s Bookclub for that. I don’t have it all figured out.

I was pointing out, during a skype chat, that all of Wi’s “friends” [Vox neighgors], for the most part, almost exclusively, are women. Not a jealous thing… just an observation. He said, “Yes, but I talked about you a lot today. I posted about you” And from elsewhere in the room I heard the voice of his daughter, aged 8 – or perhaps her sister, aged 7 – say “He talks about you ALL THE TIME!! ALL THE TIME!”

Thanks, kids…. good to know. Five American dollars for both of you.

Standard
Uncategorized

Let us sprinkle blue cheese on everything!

Hello, and welcome to my lunch. I’m having a delicious made before my eyes cobb salad. What I like about cobb salad is, it lets you feel smug because you are eating salad. And salad is healthy. But in reality, it’s the biggest calorie bomb ever. They should just go ahead and sprinkle it with french fries. Oh well, it does posses a green leafy substances and there are those who would say that it’s all worth if if I eat a vegetable. Mmmmm…. bacon bits.

This last weekend was one of the weekends I stayed In Country. I obviously prefer the more exotic, International Weekends. But yesterday was the littlest Moon’s 1st birthday party, and I needed to give her many cute outfits from Gymboree. I really needed to. It’s like everything that came out in this new line was made for little angelic, redheaded babies. If you are unfamiliar with the Gymboree experience, everything they have goes together. Each season they have a new line. And it all follows a certain color scheme. Things mix and match and buying clothes there is like crack. Because there is always just one more adorable thing you need to add to the pile. it’s very difficult for me to spend little money there. And I still regret not buying Simone those stripey leggings. I love stripey things. It all started because of this sweater. I saw it across the store and I was a goner.

Anyway, when we sang Happy Birthday to Simone, I added a quick “and my blog” under my breath. And I dedicated half my rainbow confetti birthday cake, with purple frosting and chocolate ice cream on the side, to it. My little blog.

So many birthdays from the middle of August to the middle of September. Yesterday was Jack’s birthday as well, and now that I have made the connection between my blog’s anniversary and his birthday, I’ll probably never forget it. Happy Birthday Jack! I think that sometime this weekend, it was my cousin Craig’s birthday as well. So happy birthday to him. Today is my father’s birthday, and I always miss him on his birthday. He would have been … let me see…. math… 69? Yes, I believe so.

Saturday evening I taught my cousin, Kirsten, how to do page layout in Adobe InDesign, instead of in Photoshop. And we ate steak, baked potato and peach pie for dinner. So you know that was a good evening. And that was my weekend. You are all caught up, my salad is complete, and it’s back to work for me.

That was pretty dull, huh? I’m sorry. I’ll be more entertaining later, I promise. But all in all, the weekend was pretty normal, pleasant and uneventful in the way of blog fodder.

Standard
thenandnow

Then and Now: Episode 33 The Happy Birthday, Blog Episode

Happy Birthday, Blog! Now you are 4 years old. In a year, you’ll start school, but for now, enjoy your preschool years. While you can. I’ve saved up a bunch of Sesame Street on the tivo for you, and afterwards we can have cake!

So, for my blog’s birthday, I’ve decided to do a Then and Now that features one of my favorites, The Eels. In a slightly different format this time, as I don’t have much to say about the original, except that I’ve always thought it was a very sweet song. And I chose it simply because the Eels covered it. Sometimes, it works like that.

Thanks everyone for reading my little blog. I can’t help falling in love with all of you. Honest. Yes… even you!

Can’t Help Falling in Love – Elvis Presley

Can’t Help Falling in Love – The Eels

Standard
Uncategorized

Subtract 32, divide by 9 and then multiply by 5.

My hair is ginormous today. I washed it last night and did not put in any “Ok, why don’t you just calm the hell down” type stuff in it. It dried in a poof. This morning, I put some “Ok, why don’t you just calm the hell down” type stuff in, but it was too late. My hair had won the battle. It just soaked that stuff up like … something that soaks a great deal. A sponge, mayhap? It’s a nimbus cloud around my head now. [I just really wanted to use the phrase ‘nimbus cloud’]

Every afternoon this week I am in javascript training. For dummies. And I am lovin‘ it! We make little scripts all afternoon long, and I ask questions and she, the teacher, helps me and it’s like everything I liked about school. Yesterday, we made scripts to convert Fahrenheit to Celsius. [ok, it took me 16 tries to spell Fahrenheit properly.] This is very handy when you visit a metric place, like Canada. However, the script does not execute in my head, so I would have to have a computer handy. We also converted American dollars into Thai bahts. There are approximately 42 bahts for every dollar. So… if you ever go to Thailand and the hookers seem way overpriced, find out if that’s in bahts or dollars.

Standard
Uncategorized

It is your responsibility to ensure that the products that you purchase may be lawfully imported into the United States.

I went to Victoria this weekend, and returned, with no incidents. That is to say, my ID remained safe at all times. Later, when I have more energy, I will share my road rage with you, from the trip up on Friday evening. Tell me, how hard is it to understand this concept: Keep Right Except to Pass. Or this one: Slower Traffic Stay Right?

In the old days, before 9/11, crossing the border was laughably easy. Where are you from? Where are you going? How long are you staying? Have a nice time. And coming back was equally easy, with one additional question – do you have anything to declare?

Now, they are curious about all aspects of your visit. And your life. Both Canadian and US custom agents are very interested in how I ended up with a Canadian boyfriend. They ask me, just like that, too. How did you end up with a Canadian boyfriend? And while I am always tempted to say “Just lucky, I guess,” they don’t have much of a sense of humor. I try to avoid the wise crackery. It’s hard for me to just say that we met on the internet. I’m always tempted to start out with “Well, I have this blog, you see, and one day he found it, and then….. ” I mean, how much detail do they want? You wouldn’t think they’d want much, but last night, the US customs agent wanted to know how everything was working out. Between me and my Canadian boyfriend. He was a bit sassy, tho. He also asked me, in these exact words, “Soooo…. whadya got?”

“What do I got… what do I have? You mean, what did I buy?”

“Yeah.”

“Ummm… nothing.”

I guess it could get boring asking the same old questions day after day.

Standard
Uncategorized

Not many people do eat backside of chicken, to be honest. Not even in KFC – not even if you get the bargain bucket.

I realized I never told you guys what to do if you are a: American and b: in Canada with no ID. Well, that depends. If you have a passport, the consulate can help you, as passports are issued by the state department. However, if you are in the country with a missing birth certificate and dr’s license, don’t bother. The first day you try will end up being a Canadian holiday like BC day, and they will be closed. And the second day, you will spend hours waiting and waiting, only to find out that they can’t help you and you should return to Victoria, file a police report and just go to the border. But, you won’t go back to Victoria until the next day, because you’ve already paid for another night in that really nice, albeit expensive, hotel room and you are not leaving until one minute before check out time. Not without the use of excessive force. Oooo, and just for fun, get ready to take the first ferry to the states on a day when homeland security has raised the alert due to terrorist activities. Hint, they won’t let you on the boat if you don’t have a reservation. At this point, it’s time to laugh, because of course homeland security has raised the alert on the day when you are trying to cross the border with no id. However, don’t worry, you’ll actually drive across the border in Vancouver with very little trouble. Go figure.

You know, I had all these great stories about my time in Victoria and Vancouver, but because I didn’t blog them right away, they’ve become a bit fuzzy. Like the drunk, probably domicile challenged, man we stopped to talk to that first night. He was telling us about an altercation he had with a man across the street. Apparently our guy had always been very generous when he found himself with weed, but the guy across the street was not so into sharing, and things got heated. The stingy man mentioned that he had a knife, and our guy explained that he was not at all worried about that knife, as he planned to punch him the throat and then step on his head. I wish I could remember more of the details, because it was vastly entertaining, but all i can remember was how enchanted I was with his threats. Every time he mentioned what he planned to do to his buddy, I would echo back in a yell “YEAH!!! PUNCH HIM THE NECK! AND THEN STEP ON HIS HEAD!!”

Then there was the night we had to have KFC. You know how that is. So we found the nearest one to our hotel, and had valet bring my car around, so we could go get a bucket o’ chicken. That’s class. But there were protesters outside of the KFC. Something about chicken cruelty. And they were actually wearing bathing suits, some of them. Wil, being a nice polite Canadian boy, gave pause to the idea of crossing their picket line. But I’m an American, and therefore I thirst blood. Causing a ruckus is what we do best. So I said, “Let me handle this.”

I appreciate everyone’s right to stand up for their cause. And I am really not all that into chicken cruelty. I don’t really like chickens. Live ones, that is. But I’m not sure I want them treated poorly. But I had a mission. And a craving. So I walked up to the protesters who gave me a flyer and told me I could eat for free at some restaurant, if I did not eat at KFC, I don’t know where, General Tsu’s House of Cardboard Teriyaki Tofu or something, and said, “Look, I don’t mean to be disrespectful, but no thank you. My baby wants chicken, and I’m going to get him some.”

I swear to god they practically held the door for me. So cute!

Standard
evildeb

Oh, me, please. I shall consume them with gravy and the butter of peanuts.

Technology is a wonderful thing, kids. Less than a week after my return from Canada, I’ve already replaced my birth certificate [over the internet, rush order] and driver’s license. I’m headed back up to Victoria this weekend. KK and Evildeb have made me promise to keep my id on my person at all times.

I was talking to Evildeb about coming up to Victoria with me, sometime, meeting Wil.

Me: you love to go places, it would be fun.

Evildeb: yeah, but I hate meeting people so there’s a slight hitch in your plan

Me: i know you do. but, i’ll take you to big bad johns and you’ll have cocktails. and eat peanuts and throw the shells on the floor. and lloyd, wil and i will handle being social, until you are drunk.

Evildeb: peanuts!! how long does it take to get there? can we go now?!

Me: uhh… depends on which route you take. it’s the peanuts that swayed you? you were like “oh no… not new people” until i mentioned peanuts. it’s not even the booze… it’s peanuts.

Evildeb: it gives you something to do with your hands

Me: The peanuts make you happy because you’ll have something to do with your hands? Deb, sometimes I love you. I don’t mean that in a lesbian way.

Evildeb: I disagree

So, if ya’ll ever want to meet Evildeb, and you know you do, bring something she can play with. She’s very shy and demure. And also the apparent lesbian love of my life.

Standard
evildeb

Thanks to Joannie…

I have named my new computer at work: Persephone – Part Time Queen of the Underworld. Persephone has the coolest job. Part time Queen of the Underworld, and also in charge of Spring!

Ok, for those of you who are wondering what Evildeb is up to, besides no good, an Evil Family story. You probably know that I consider AlmostCertainlyGoingToEndUpEvilMaggie to be one of the greatest kids on this planet. At five, she likes to collect bugs, knows all about snakes and is planning on being a Crime Scene Investigator when she grows up. She likes science and blood does not scare her because she sees it all the time. The same cannot be said for monsters. The other day, when discussing matters of anatomy with her mother, AlmostCertainlyGoingToEndUpEvilMaggie referred to the labia as “the lady butt.” Men have penises, women have lady butts. Labia —> Lady butt, I can see how that would happen. Had I been sipping a beverage when Evildeb told me that, it would have come out my nose. That kid is priceless!

This prompted a discussion about what we called male and female genitalia when we were little. I called penises flowers. Boys had flowers. Girls had them too, but they were on the inside. Flowers. That’s pretty cute. But not as good as lady butt.

Standard