faster pussycat... type! type!

You guys did such a great job last week! I think I am mucho rusty at this. I could not come up with a theme to save my life. I kept trying to use lines from the tv shows I was watching. Contenders?

• Don't be mad, monkey.
• Everyone was happy, especially the truckers in sweatpants.
• Look, will you ladies take your tea party outside? I'm trying to calm my nerves.

In the end, i chose a single word - chance.

The Dating/Crying Game
"You're not what I expected."
"Neither are you, actually"
"Well, I guess you take a chance when you answer the ads, huh."
"True."
"Look, there's been a mistake. I'm sure you are nice enough, but I'm not gay."
"I see. Well.... I'm not a man."

Posted by jodi at 12:17 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I bought the new expansion pack, Open for Business, but I have not actually played any sims since then. I think it was because I was so disappointed that the Win players would soon have pets, and I would not. However... Dr. Stevil delivered the good news today! The mac version will be out two weeks after the win version. That's the fastest turnaround yet! Wheeee! I love you Aspyr!

I'll try to be a better Sims2 goddess from now on.

Posted by jodi at 10:14 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Were you born before the end of the first Gulf war?
Of course I was, I was born before the start. If you are referring to Desert Storm. I don't know... I am sure there were other wars in the gulf.

Childhood nickname?
depends on who was talking to me. my friends often called me jo-jo or jo.

Historical person you have the biggest crush on?
George Washington, 6'8" weights a fucking ton. [he's saves children, but not the British children]

How about admire?
C.G.Jung... I'm not sure it's admire so much as I find him interesting.

Favorite type of candy?
peanut butter twix

Favorite foreign country(ies)?
Canada. Of course, I've only been to Canada and Mexico. Sorry Tijuana... Canada wins.

Fish or chicken?
Chicken

Do you have your own perfume line?
nope.

Have you ever written a children's book?
No, but when I was in college, I used to doodle this little girl I called Bethann, and her best friend Frank, and I wanted to write stories about them.

Have you been in a movie based on a book?
Hey, I let that crazy question about perfume pass, even tho it was a non-sequitor... but now you are getting random.

Ever posed nude for a photo?
yes. I was three.

Guiltiest pleasure?
sleeping in.

Your best nonguilty pleasure, then?
reading

What are you allergic to?
grass and mold

Worst pickup line you've heard?
Shut up, Slave. Ok? U like to finish?

Were you bar mitzvahed?
Nope, I'm a Unitarian

Have you ever cried during a TV interview?
Not that I recall.

If they made a movie of your life, who would play you?
Ah, that's a tuff one. At what age is this movie set? I mean, that makes a difference. I don't know, I'm open to suggestions.

Pet peeve?
Whistling.

If you weren't doing what you do, what job would you like to have?
Either a writer or a dolphin psychologist.

Place you will never be found?
The gym.

Why did you participate in this tagging?
Normally, I don't. But Blair asked me specifically, and nicely, and also I found I had no blog topic. I've been pretty dull the last few days, working, going home and straight into pajamas, chatting with Wil, going to bed, not a lot of material for blog. Oh sure, I could write all about cleaning, but really, cleaning is pretty dull. Although I should rub it in all of ya'lls faces... I did so clean! Ask Mrs. Moon. We even went to the dump!

Posted by jodi at 05:42 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

1. infastructure
2. core operating plan
3. strategic operating plan
4. execute
5. ops plan
6. deliverables
7. engagement level
8. actionable
9. margin analysis
10. aggressive timeline.

Most of them have no meaning for me. However, someone answered Evildeb's question today, wanted to make sure she was "aligned with reality" and I can see that coming in handy now and then.

Posted by jodi at 06:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

I am cleaning. I just wanted all of you who doubted me to know that. I've been cleaning for about an hour. It sucks. I hate it. Mrs. Moon will be here in about an hour and when she gets here, she's not going to let me have any fun. She'll make me keep cleaning.

She's so mean.

Posted by jodi at 10:03 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Yay. I'm Home. Not on my way to Victoria. Yippee. Who woulda thunk I'd miss the ferry wait line. But, I needed a little break, as it's a bit of a journey each weekend. Last weekend, I got a horrible headache on Sunday, wasn't feeling well and didn't even make it home until Monday morning. No, I'm serious, I really did have a headache. Anyway, I leave about 5pm on Friday, get to Tsawwassen, wait for the 9pm ferry, and get to Victoria about 11. It's a long day. So, this weekend I stayed home.

To compensate for this, I have many important plans this weekend. Chief among them are my shopping/dinner with the Girls Who Eat Meat Adventure Club. We are finally going to eat at what can only be considered THE consummate restaurant for our little club, the Buenos Aries Grill. It's all about the meat meat meat there, I'll let you know how it goes.

And second amongst these plans... cleaning. Shut up. I'm serious. I'm cleaning. I've arranged for Mrs. Moon to come and help me. I'm paying her, don't worry. She is showing up Sunday morning, and keeping me on task. And, in this way, I expect that some surfaces will be cleaned. It's a pretty genius plan. She's a cleaning/organizing savant.

So... yeah, I'm in country this weekend. Yay.

Posted by jodi at 07:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

jodi: i'm gong to bring 'em back. gimme a topic. i need a topic.
wil: i dont know, why i love you the best
jodi: i don't think why you love me best is a topic that everyone can write about. but you are free to write about it. :)
wil: well they should learn
jodi i can't write about it.
wil: well you need to learn too
jodi: fine. that will be your topic. why you love me best. but, maybe everyone else will just have to do "love"

Lord, I am rusty at this. It's been a while. But here goes. You remember the rules? Play along if you like, 50 words - no more, no less. Must include the theme or topic in order to get the extra special chicken fried bonus points, with gravy and cheese on top.

True Love

He looked over at her, at her dopey smile, her fingers that caressed the smooth surface, her eyes wide with desire.

His jealousy was embarrassing, but he couldn't help it. He snatched the MacBook Pro away.

"Jeez... you love it so much, why don't you just marry it!"

Posted by jodi at 12:18 AM | Permalink | Comments (12)

I've Then and Now'ed this song before, but did not know about this version. It's making me so happy today, I had to share it.

Posted by jodi at 10:56 AM | Permalink | Comments (5) | TrackBacks (1)

I can be slightly competitive about certain things. Events requiring physical prowess or coordination, like sports, not so much. I'm quite sure you can run faster and farther than I. All of you... any one of you... you won't have much competition from me. I'm a competitive parker of cars. Not in skill, but in proximity to destination. I will sometimes not want to give up a parking place, because it's so prime, even if there are other parking spaces available. (This is why I could never again live in San Francisco, the stress of parking would make me insane. It's bad enough in Seattle) I hate to admit it, because you won't believe me when I tell you that I don't crave the spotlight - honestly, but I really do have a need to be the most entertaining. Sometimes. I work on that one, constantly. I want to be the most entertaining, and yet, I don't want to always be entertaining. Explain that one, will you? Love me the most, but don't put too much pressure on me, because I may not always have the energy to live up to your needs. Christ, what a mess.

But! I did not start this post to talk about my occasional insecurities and need for validation of my worth! Dag nabbit, no! I came to speak of the most sacred of all competitions ... Trivial Pursuit.

I don't know what it is about my brain that collects the random crap, but I'm full of useless facts. Hence, I love the Trivial Pursuit. Not all the pie colors. I hate the blue (geography) and I am not crazy about yellow (history). The pink (entertainment) is my best pie color by far.

The last couple of weekends, I have played Trivial Pursuit with Wil and his friends. One thing I noticed right off, as the only American in the group, I am expected to know all American History or Political questions. And it's far more humiliating when I don't, when surrounded by Canadians. Canadians who kept helping each other with the questions! Like.. helping the other team! They said it was because they were Canadian, polite and helpful. I told them they'd get their asses kicked if they played TP like that, in the States. And Wil! He's the worst! If he were on my team, I would keep my hand over his mouth and he'd only be allowed to speak when given permission.

My team won, the first week. We would have won the second week, as well, but there were more people playing and more children running around and it was too distracting. We'd be lucky if we made it all the way around the table once without interruption. My heart wasn't in it.

Wil can't let go of the fact that he answered one question correctly... a question he claims no one else could have answered. I don't even remember the question itself, but the answer is a tv show M.A.N.T.I.S. It hardly matters, we are done with Trivial Pursuit. We are moving on to strip mah jong medley,.. now that he has a mac. He's in for it, tho. I'm a mah jong master. He shouldn't even bother putting pants on.

Posted by jodi at 10:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

Mr. Moon was telling me the story of a 17 year old member of his extended family who is pregnant, and the daughter of a fundamentalist Christian. He feels bad for the girl, and the parents, because they have a tough road ahead of them. So does the baby. Anyway, in the course of our discussion, we've decided to create our own religion.

Mr Moon: so far, i'm the only kid in like 4 generations that hasn't had a kid out of wedlock, so i've got that going for me
me: which is good. and only confirms my thoughts on fundamentalist christianity. anytime you make a fundamentally human thing, like love and sex, taboo, and don't talk about it, and the repercussions and such...
Mr Moon: yes - it confirms my thoughts, too - but i still feel badly.
me: you are asking for trouble.
Mr Moon: absolutely agree with you
me: of course you do, cuz we are the brilliant.
Mr Moon: the brilliant - that should be our new religion
me: EXCELLENT! or at least our band name.
Mr Moon: um...hi, we're The Brilliant and we were wondering if you've let denial and tabooism destroy your life of efficacious communication? if so, can you read our pamphlet?
me: oh, we SO need to make our pamphlet
Mr Moon: i am soooooooooooooo down with it
me: i'm so excited by our pamphlet
Mr Moon: the practitioners could be called "SHURPA"s, 'cuz the world view would be a combination of Sarcasm, Humanitarianism, Unitarianism, Realism, Pragmatism, Absurdism, and Situationism
me: NICE!!!! this, truly is THE BRILLIANT
Mr Moon: yea, i like that.
Mr Moon: so the pamphlet should have some symbology - i'm not sure why, but humans crave symbology with their religions - so we gotta work on that - something like a Universe collapsing into a singularity and then the singularity exploding into a mass and how can you graphically display consciousness being a fluke?!?
me: ummm... clip art?

Posted by jodi at 06:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (8)

Saturday, Wil and I took a bunch of his laundry down to the laundry mat, to get it all done at once. A lot of the clothes had not seen the light of day since summer began. Initially, Wil thought to instruct me on the proper way to do laundry, and that was just to stuff everything into washers, willy nilly, so that everything would come out a nice uniform color. A nice theory, but the one area of housework I come close to excelling at is laundry, and my shocked dismay at his laundry procedure had him admitting he did a sort of lightist/darkish separation thing.

We fit all the wet clothes into two big dryers, and we each took the contents of one to fold, when the clothes were dry. I then took every tshirt he folded and refolded it properly. That is to say, in such a manner that they are about the same size when folded and fit into a drawer nicely. (As long as it's flat, I can fold it nicely. Fitted sheets? Forget about it, I try to make a nicely shaped, flattish wad out of 'em. )

When we got home, I started to hang up the buttoned shirts and some of pants on the hangers we had bought at Linens n' Things. His new place had no hangers. Now, those of you who know me, who've been to my house, are probably starting to freak out a bit at this point of the story. So was I.

"Look... I'm currently giving you an impression of me that is entirely inaccurate. This is not me. I don't do this. I do laundry, but my clothes live, nicely folded in the beginning, at the end of my couch because my dresser is broken. Don't get used to this domestic shit. I'm just trying to be nice or helpful or something dumb like that."

You'll be happy to know that I did not put the nicely folded clothes away, but sorta stacked them on the top of the dresser, the floor, or the coffee table. I haven't completely lost my mind.

Posted by jodi at 10:38 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I don't know why. I have no reason to be. Except that I have four cases and I can't solve any of them, let alone recreate them. Bums me out, makes me feel stupid.

I tried to write a post about buying jeans last night, but it didn't work out. So I am going to make another attempt later, on the ferry. Right now, I am just trying to come to terms with the fact that the "day" has at least 3 hours and 30 minutes left in it.

I'm using this song to get thru it... best when played loud naturally.

The Killers - All These Things I've Done

Posted by jodi at 01:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Yesterday was a pretty good day. As a birthday present, my cousin Kirsten was given a gift certificate to the nekkid lady spa, by her husband. When we discussed this idea, I told him that I was concerned that Kirsten would be frightened, and disoriented, surrounded by all those naked ladies, at the spa for only the 2nd time in her life, all alone. And, if need be, I would sacrifice some of my time, and money, to accompany her. And so I did. Which is why I have babysoft skin right now. And toes that are painted "Double Decker Red." I'm a giver.

The woman who did my scrub and moisturizing treatment was different than the other woman who have scrubbed and moisturized me. She had a different routine. Not better, just different. She seemed to go after my neck and décolletage area while I was lying on my side, bottom leg out stretched, top leg bent at the knee. Which means she'd lift my chin for me. Lying on my side like I was, I felt a bit like my cat, when I scratch her under her chin. I wondered if it would be appropriate to purr. I decided not. She was very vigorous with her scrubbing, and at times I wondered if the table legs, which were wooden, wouldn't just snap and I would tumble naked to the wet, tiled floor, and wouldn't that be hysterical because they'd probably feel really bad and give me some free treatments to make up for it. Probably massages - in case I was hurt.

For some reason I can't fathom, I was very uncomfortable when she was working on my face. She did all these extra massagey, finger tappy things that none of the previous scrub technicians had performed. Every time she got near my eyes, it was all I could do not to flinch. When she started piling on the cold cucumber compress, I felt a bit panicky. Like I wasn't going to be able to breath.[It reminded me of the time my Moür Moür wanted to make a plaster mask of my face. She wanted to put two straws in my nose, so I could breath, and then make a cast of the rest of my face. I wouldn't let her, the idea just filled me with panic. She was annoyed with me, but annoyance has never swayed me once I have made up my mind.] And I was tempted to get up, and run out of the scrub area screaming "stay away from my eyes!!!" Don't worry, I held it together. But she made me nervous somehow, I can't describe it. It's not like the cover your entire face with the stuff. And It's not like I have not had it done before.

So it wasn't my best trip to the nekkid lady spa. But, like sex and pizza, it's pretty darn hard to have a bad one.... it's still a trip to the spa, right?

Posted by jodi at 02:24 PM | Permalink

I know that I appear to be a gal who has everything under control, who has a firm grasp on the situation. Who is on the ball. Who owns the fucking ball. I know what you are thinking. You are thinking, "Jodi, yes... this is exactly what you seem to be, although I doubt I would refer to you as a 'gal' because that is somehow demeaning and does not coincide with someone of your composure."

Sadly, it's untrue. Even I have cracks in my facade.

I have things in my life now that I have not had in a very long time. And that makes me happy. But, I haven't had them in a really long time for a reason. So it also scares me. And brings me annoying moments of self doubt. During these moments, I play my least productive game. It's the game where I look at some random stranger, and deduce in a matter of moments, how much better she is at everything. Better than me. God I hate it when I play this game.

Take the girl who is parked next to me on the ferry right now. [The ferry that does not have electrical outlets, btw. In case you were wondering. ] Something tells me that she does not wait until the end of the day to make up her face, in the visor mirror, in the dark. She doesn't go about her work day looking tired and shiny. Her little red Honda is spotless, and I bet her house is as well. I bet she doesn't have dishes piled up. And I am sure she would clean the littler box before leaving for the weekend, instead of considering out of sight cat poop out of mind cat poop. I bet she is not going through a period of professional crisis, which continues to build upon itself until she doubts she'll ever be able to do her job well again. Her cube is probably clean, everyone likes her and thinks she's amazing. She's probably employee of the month right now.

I see no split ends in her hair in her perfectly coifed hair, which probably never dares to snarl and rat. And that cell phone that is attached to her ear most likely holds an extensive list of friends who clamor for her time each and every weekend. When she flosses her teeth, which she does each and every evening before bed, she probably never rinses with dr pepper. Speaking of rinsing, I bet she's never had to change into her yoga pants, and wash the only pair of pants she has with her in the sink of the washroom at the ferry terminal, because she's spilled some incredibly unhealthy food on them and stained them. And now they sit, damp, spread out, in the back seat to dry. She probably never eats unhealthy food.

On the other hand.... when she left her car, she put on The Club. The anti-theft device that attaches to your steering wheel. While her car is parked, surrounded by dozens of cars. On a ferry. In the middle of the ocean. With no possible escape for would be thieves.

At least I'm not a moron. And so, in the end, I win the game. Ha!

Posted by jodi at 07:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (8)

Wil used my video camera to document our weekend. He put a little movie up on his blog, if you want to see it.

No, there is nothing dirty on it! Shame on you!

Posted by jodi at 09:34 AM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Hello from Victoria, where I am enjoying my own modern love... Wil and I met on line, that's modern... right? Anyway, I like this song. Why I chose it explained below.

Modern Love - David Bowie

My latest favorite show, which I started watching in reruns this summer, is Grey's Anatomy. One of my favorite things about this show is Sandra Oh, whom I've loved since Double Happiness. But my 2nd favorite thing is the music. They play some great music on this show. I am not sure what episode I was watching... and it took me a minute to even recognize where I had heard this song before, it was so different. The band has the song for download on their website - yay! Love that! So go check them out, for being so friendly and generous.

My 3rd favorite thing about the show is George.

Modern Love - The Last Town Chorus

Posted by jodi at 09:53 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)

"The Sims 2: Open for Business (Mac)" (Aspyr Media)

Wheeeee!!!

Posted by jodi at 07:30 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

I've pimped Ze Frank's The Show before... but I'm pimping it again today because today's show was so very very good. And important. Completely different from the norm, it should not be missed. Not that the normal shows should be missed either. I'm just saying... you know... that this one should really not be missed even more than normal. Because...

You should be watching it every day anyway!!!

Posted by jodi at 12:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

This is a short distance dedication for KK... not because of any "special" aspects to our relationship, but rather just to make her laugh.

Posted by jodi at 07:23 PM | Permalink

But Mr. Moon said that autumn leaves were too cliché, so I went with just an overall autumnal color scheme.

Refresh!

Posted by jodi at 07:49 AM | Permalink | Comments (8)

So, yesterday, I was in the lines to load on to the 5pm ferry from Victoria to Vancouver, lane 4 to be specific. Lanes 1-4 were loading onto the Vancouver ferry. Lanes 6-9 were loading on to a different ferry. Lane 5 was empty. Several cars ahead of me, was an empty car. Despite the more the ample warning to return to your vehicle, the occupants had not. We each drove around the car and back into lane 4. Suddenly, dashing through the moving cars of lanes 6-9, across lane 5, and in front of a silver Mercedes, came a little blond kid. The silver Mercedes had to slam on it's breaks, but didn't come close to hitting the kid. The father, a large man with a shaved head, followed soon after, yelling at his kids and wife.

Ok, so we are loaded onto the ferry. People are starting to get out of their cars and head upstairs for the fine gourmet type snacks available on ferry boats, when all of the sudden, the large bald man comes barreling up the path. He starts shouting at the occupants of the silver Mercedes, specifically the driver, an older asian gentleman. The asian man kept asking "What are you talking about?" obviously confused. The large bald man had some kind of Eastern European accent, and it was sort of hard to understand him at times. The yelling aspect didn't help. Something about the Mercedes guy driving fast through a parking lot, almost hitting his kid. And then he, the driver, apparently "got back into his Mercedes" like it didn't matter. The thing is, we weren't in a parking lot. We were in the loading lanes. Lanes full of moving traffic. Traffic that had to divert because he could not get back to his car on time. And... the driver of the Merc didn't "get back into his Mercedes" because he never left it.

The large bald man was using the word "fuck," and any derivatives of it, a lot. The asian men, in their dockers and button down short sleeved plaid shirts, were starting to become insulted. "Fuck you!" and "No, fuck YOU!" were bandied back and forth, until finally, the large balk man shoves the driver of the Mercedes. And that's when the fun started. The asian men went on the offense and some general shoving and girly type slapping occurred.

Now, I got out of my car and started yelling "Fight! Fight! Fight!" I was on the side of the Mercedes. The bald guy was beyond reason, and seemed to want to fight. So, I suggested tossing him overboard. "Do you require the assistance of THE TINY FISTS OF DOOM?" But, men from the cars around me started pulling them all apart. Telling the Mercedes driver to just walk away, and a ferry employee had to physically pull the bald guy away from it. And so... the fun ended before any actual blood was shed. Sad.

As a side note, I would just like to point out, both cars were sporting Canadian plates. So... can't blame any of it on loud, obnoxious, rude Americans. Except for any part I played. Which, was minimal at best. Because what I wrote up there? About me egging them on? Not true. The fight did happen, but I watched it from my car, with an air of bemusement.

Posted by jodi at 03:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

I want someone to give me a list of things I need. Supplies required for me to be successful in the upcoming year. Clear rulers, not wooden. New crayons. Some Dixon Ticondergoa No. 2 Pencils.

Then, I want to go out and purchase my new supplies, organize them, and put them away in a new bag or backpack, ready to meet the year. It would not be enough to simply go buy these things. I need someone to give a list of requirements. I want to need to buy school supplies.

Posted by jodi at 12:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

Hi!

Just got home from Victoria, and I am tired. But I have some stories to tell, including the punch out fight I witnessed on the ferry. Not to mention the pod of orcas. But in the meantime, I leave you with some regular Victoria scenery. The Darth Vader who plays violin.

Posted by jodi at 10:51 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

xox,

Jodi

Posted by jodi at 01:58 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)